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Dear Hurting Wife, I See You

Dear hurting wife, I see you.

I see you because I know you.

I see you because I am you.

I see you your despair behind your cleverly crafted social media posts.

I see your questions because I, too, have questioned.

I see your fears for I, too, have nearly been consumed by my own.

I see your loneliness while standing in the midst of the crowd.

I see your tears when you are alone because you don’t want the kids to see. For if they see then they may also know your pain. You would never wish this on them. Not in a million years.

I see you sitting on your sofa staring out the window longing for life to flutter by and for hope to rise on the horizon.

I see you grasping for anything that is true.

I see you longing for something or someone you can trust.

I see you longing for someone to understand.

I see you wishing someone would validate your anger, because behind that anger is so much pain and sadness that desires connection.

Dear hurting wife, I see you.

I wish I could fix it for you but I can’t. I don’t have solutions.

But I can offer you hope. Even if only a glimmer of hope to keep those last few embers alive.

Dear hurting wife, this page in your story is a comma not a period.

Winston Churchill is quoted to have said, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.”

Dear hurting wife, keep going.

Gently wipe that last tear to make room for the next one. It’s okay to cry.

Keep putting one foot in front of the other – even if the steps are small.

Please remember that two steps forward and one step back still leaves you one step forward.

Just like winter miraculously turns to spring through the ache of death and buried seedlings push through barren soil reaching fierce for light, your pain will bear sweet fruit.

Those scars on your heart? They will become the most beautiful flowers in your garden.

Dear hurting wife, I see you.

More importantly, so does your Father.

Keep going.

Redemption awaits.

Redemption may not bear the image your heart longs for, but redemption will come one way or another.

Keep going.

He is before all things, in Him all things hold together.” Colossians 1:17 NIV

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18 NIV

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30 NIV

For further reading, you may find great comfort in Isaiah 54.


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